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Joke of the Day
"Two fish in a tank. One says to the other... ""how do you drive this thing?"""
Next Joke
"Whats's better than roses on your piano? Tulips on your organ."
"Your mama is so stupid... ...during the first ultrasound, she asked her OB/GYN if the baby was hers."
"What's the three fastest ways of communication? Telephone, telegraph, and tell-a-woman."
"Pregnancy tests in movies are so weird... She hands him the test and he stands there holding this stick of pee like it isn't a stick of pee"
"I bought a grandfather clock. It's like a regular clock but it keeps telling you that it's lived through three wars."
"A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife."
"People on Facebook Nowadays: *Clicks pic while sipping coffee* *Posts as DP with irrelevant caption: Every scar makes me who I am* WTF?"
"Accidently played dad instead of dead when I encountered a bear. Now it can ride a bike without training wheels."
"Today i made a mistake while sewing. Oops, wrong thread."