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Joke of the Day

"I bought a grandfather clock. It's like a regular clock but it keeps telling you that it's lived through three wars."

Next Joke
 
"It makes me sad that in this age of computers and video games, my children will never understand what it's like to be raised by television."
"Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't run home"
"A man enters the drum section of a music store.. Shopkeeper: ""Sir, you can play here for a while, but then I've gotta ask you to beat it."""
"Molestation, mo'problems"
"I'm not an alpha male I'm a male"
"cheap toilet paper. it isn't worth shit."
"What does Batman say when he goes down on a woman? To the bat cave!"
" ...Oh the weather outside's delightful, the balance in my account is frightful, what happened to all my dough, I dunno, I dunno, I dunnnnoooooo... "
"Sister posted on FB: pray for me, I have a test tomorrow. My comment: it's cheating if Jesus helps you. Solidifying my black sheep status"