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Joke of the Day

"My Uncle When I was a young boy, my Uncle would always tell me ""Always leave them wanting more"" Which is probably why he lost his job in famine relief."

"Me: I want cozy pajama pants for Christmas. Him: I was gonna get lingerie. Me: Trust me. VS won't have your size. Him: Me: *jazz hands*"

"Did you hear about the woman who had to quit her job as an air traffic controller to date a monk? She got out of the flying plans and into the friar."

"HIV Test Where are you getting your test done, at a gay bar? Hey doc do you feel the HIV in my ass yet? Almost, I need to finish first. (As the gay doc fucks your ass and puts the hiv in you.)"

"yeah, we r a non-traditional family. instead of naming our dog, we let him name us. I'm Woof, this is my husband Woof, & these r Woof & Woof"

"My co worker just asked if I could help file some documents. I said I was working on a huge project while she watched me play solitaire."

"I really love Bruce Willis. I have all of his movies, hundreds of posters, and multiple autographs You might say that I'm a die-hard fan"

"Police are looking for a man who refuses to update his PDF reader. He is described as 32, single and has no fixed adobe."

"Two guys walk into a bar.... The third guy ducks. Lol"

"an Irishman, Englishman an Scotsman walk into a bar The bartender says, ""Is this a joke"""