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Joke of the Day
"You know what's Obama doing right now? He's Havana good time (sorry)"
Next Joke
"This self checkout lane has the sexiest cashier."
"Judas: *Sips wine* Great, water again, very funny Jesus:HAHA I got you! Judas: So glad this is our last supper Jesus: what? Judas: what?"
"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? She choked. Edit: Think LONG and HARD about it."
"(Ad for a baby) gently used can't even kill you doesn't shed poops on a learning curve goes from 0-60 in roughly 60 years"
"""please human with me"" - bear"
"What did the tampon tell the other tampon? Nothing, both were stuck up bitches."
"You're the best ninja I've ever seen! And the worst ninja in general."
"Why did Michael Jackson go to Macy's? He heard boys' pants were half off."
"[checks Facebook & sees my 4th grade girlfriend has liked my hot chocolate recipe share] ME: I knew she'd come crawling back to me one day"