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Joke of the Day

"Two blondes were walking down the railroad tracks. The first blonde said ""man, these steps are killing me!"" The second one said ""it's not the steps that are killing me, it's these low hand rails!"""

"Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm schizophrenic..... ... and so am I."

"If you're looking for someone to tell you what to do in the bedroom I'm pretty good at instructing on how to install window blinds."

"I feel like landlords who don't allow dogs but DO allow children don't know very much about children."

"What sentence is vastly shorter after you remove one word from it? Child porn"

"Why did the marijuana addict always turn his supply packet around when buying it? He heard the grass is greener on the other side"

"Have you heard the original version of Stevie Wonder's hit song? I just called to say.....I found the phone"

"Have you heard the story when the idiot said no?"

"Did you hear about that broom on the news?? It's sweeping the nation"

"Why does your Penis bend? It follows a pair'o'bollock trajectory."