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Joke of the Day

"If you're looking for someone to tell you what to do in the bedroom I'm pretty good at instructing on how to install window blinds."

"What would be the name of a rock if she's female? ROCKelle."

"Is it gay in here or is it just Glee?"

"Why does a chicken coop have two doors? Because if it had four doors, it would be a chicken sedan."

"*Looks around nervously* The steam from my pasta is ungluing my chest hair toupee and the other mafia bosses are taking notice."

"What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vendor? Make me one with everything. - Danny DeVito from Inside the Actor's Studio"

"TRICKLE DOWN ECONOMICS EXPLAINED: 1) Rich people make money 2) It ""trickles down"" to offshore banks 3) Government closes libraries/hospitals"

"That Russian guy died today.... I guess that's one we can Chekov the list."

"Who fills in for the president of Russia when he's on leave? Deputin"

"Outbreak - New Strain of Bird Flu Discovered!!! It's called Chirpies. It's a Canarial Disease. It's Untweetable."