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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a guy who plays Fallout? A Fall Out Boy."

"Why couldn't Jesus eat M&M's? because of the holes in his hands"

"We really need to stop with the cute names for devastating storms. Winter Storm Voldemort would be taken much more seriously."

"'Ukraine's crisis has been caused by the west.' - Putin"

"I'm wearing a push-up bra and can still only do 3 push-ups. Would not recommend."

"I said I don't want to talk to you, I didn't say ignore me. WOMEN"

"What do lesbians and chinese people have in common They both like to eat pussy"

"Why does bread not have eyebrows? Because it's bread."

"Just converted my savings to pesos and HOLY SHIT am I rich!!!!!!!!"

"God: So I was, all, what if there was a fish made of jelly? Like, jelly but alive and in the sea? LOL [angels look nervously at one another]"