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Joke of the Day

"Rene Descartes walks into a bar. The bartender says, ""Would you like a beer?"" Descartes replies, ""I think not,"" and promptly disappears."

"What do you get hanging from apple trees? Sore Arms."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? (Why?) To get to the idiots house."

"never trust a person who says they don't like chocolate, even dogs eat chocolate and it kills them"

"What did the male Dragonborn say to the female dragon? GO - VAH - KYUUM!!!"

"10 qualities of a perfect girlfriend: 1. Truthful 2. Intelligent 3. Gentle 4. Humble 5. Tolerant 6. Polite 7. Understanding 8. Sexy 9. Smart 10. Young In short:- T.I.G.H.T.P.U.S.S.Y"

"Overactive Bladder Hotline. Can you hold please?"

"""I've been a bad girl,"" she said. ""I need to be punished."" So I installed Windows 10 on her laptop."

"If I ever fire someone who is a Taylor Swift fan I'll say ""I knew you were trouble when you clocked in."""

"My girlfriend caught me blow-drying my dick And apparently ""heating up her meal"" is the wrong answer."