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Joke of the Day

"A friend told me that I don't understand irony... ... which is ironic, because I was was waiting for a bus at the time. -- Alanis Morissette (not really)"

Next Joke
 
"Why did the blind lady fall into a well? Because she couldn't see that well. *crickets, crickets*"
"Wife Wanted A man inserted an advertisement in the classifieds ""Wife Wanted"". The next day, he received hundreds of replies, all reading: ""You can have mine"
"As a fat guy I never really have more pep in my step... But I do occasionally get a little more throttle in my waddle."
"A good name for a vintage store would be 'Pants Dead People Have Farted In'"
"After a disappointing summer, Humpty Dumpty ended up having a great fall."
"What do JFK and Obama have in common? Well, nothing yet."
"[3 guys corner me in an alley] 3G: Bet you're scared Me: *shows them my wife's credit card bills* 3G: *hand over their wallets* holy shit"
"Open books don't get judged by their covers."
"Clock Joke Very Funny Why do people never eat clocks? Because it's really time consuming."