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Joke of the Day

"I give to you a joke I made up when I was seven: Why did the computer crash? Because it had a bad driver! drops mic"

"""Look at me! I'm a ninja!"" - 4yo not getting the whole ninja concept yet."

"what did Putin say to Ukraine? Crimea river."

"5: Daddy whatcha doin'? Me: Cleaning my shot gun 5:Why? Me: Because one day a boy will like you 5:You mean like Ben? *racks the chamber*"

"Two quick jokes How do you make a dog go meow? Freeze it in a block of ice an run it through a band-saw... MMMEEEOOOOWWWW! How do you make a cat go woof? Pour kerosene on it an drop a match... WOOOFF!"

"What's the one movie that Rick Astley won't let you borrow? He's never gonna give you Up."

"You see those cows over there? They are outstanding in their field."

"How do you email a sandwich? In bytes. *Ba dum tss*"

"Wanna hear two short jokes and a long joke? Joke Joke Jooooooooke."

"STEWARDESS: omg the plane's about to crash but the SOS message can only be 140 characters! what are we going to do?? ME: *slowly stands up*"