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Joke of the Day

"What's the one movie that Rick Astley won't let you borrow? He's never gonna give you Up."

"What's the difference between a kid and a drawer? A drawer won't scream when I force my junk into it."

"Don't smoke kids... Because smoking kids is illegal."

"So in the old days Jesus told me that he needs an ark, I reply : ""I noah guy"""

"I call my husband current... He likes it better than number two."

"Where did the dog breeder keep his savings ? In bark-lays bank !"

"Why was the egg kicked out of the comedy club? Because he was telling bad yolks!"

"I told an Aussie friend I was having trouble rooting my phone He replied, ""Maybe try buying it dinner first, mate. """

"Police Officer: Do you speak English? Jose: Yes. Police Officer: Where are you from? Jose: Yes"

"Called to my managers office today He said ""you can't wear pyjamas to work you idiot!"" I replied "" everyone else does though"" He replied ""THEIR PATIENTS"""