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Joke of the Day

"INTERVIEWER: Says here you do magic tricks? ME: *hands him back his business card* Is this your card? INTERVIEWER: holy shit"

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"I never run with scissors Those last two words were unnecessary"
"What game do Africans play everyday? THE HUNGER GAMES (I'M GOING TO HELL)"
"How do you make a starfish shine? Drop it in sparkling water."
"Something something april fools SANDERS CUCKED BY DAUGHTER FUCK TRUMP kasich 2016 Aaaaaaaand submit."
"Did Adam and Eve ever have a date? No, but they had an Apple. "
"What's more Irish than eating potatoes? Not eating potatoes."
"Is Viagra classified as a soft drug, or a hard drug?"
"How do you spell relief? F-A-R-T"
"Just found out that umbrellas open up. I always wondered why my rain stick never kept me dry. We never stop learning do we."
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