176900

Joke of the Day

"How do you stop a 200 pound hamster from charging? Take away it's credit cards."

"Why do Scottish men wear kilts? Sheep can hear a zipper a mile away..."

"Shame about Amanda Todd, killed by dyslexia. The label on the bleach said ""seek attention if ingested"", not ""seek attention and ingest""."

"Sometimes it's not about missing someone, it's about reloading and trying again."

"Waiter: Is Pepsi ok? Pepsi: I'm fine."

"My mate dug a hole in the garden and filled it with water....I think he meant well."

"What's better than eating a mandarin? Eating Amanda out"

"Why don't kleptomaniacs ever get puns? The take everything, literally."

"""Objection your honor, the defense is badg-"" BADGERING THE WITNESS! JINX! You can't talk. *Judge gives a respectful nod* ""Case dismissed."""

"I can't believe I just stopped a girl from being rapped. I got tired and stopped chasing her."