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Joke of the Day

"What do communists put in their soup? Soviet Onions."

"As soon as they heard the flush, my phone interview took a drastic turn."

"Kim Davis becoming a Republican, dealing a huge blow to the ""intolerant homophobic religious fundamentalist"" wing of the Democratic Party."

"My really jacked friend shockingly ran out of protein powder today. He told me and I was like, No Whey"

"What did the Buddhist Monk say to the Hot Dog Vendor? ""Make me one with everything"" (assuming he would be able to talk in the first place)"

"So a turkey and a ham are walking into a cancer survivors meeting... The ham looks over at the turkey and says: ""What are you doing here? You aren't cured. """

"Hipsters liked the other side of the pillow before it was cool."

"You know what's really great about being a narcissist? Me."

"About to go out and make some foreign dude's night by butchering the pronunciation of the food I'll be ordering."

"What do you call a neolithic taking a walk? A meanderthal"