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Joke of the Day

"62% of swimmers say they pee in the ocean....... now you know why SpongeBob is yellow."

"Why was the Egyptian kid confused? Because his daddy was a mummy"

"[Morgan Freeman voice] Isolated from his group, this penguin will not survive [penguin voice] Hey dude, I can hear you."

"What kind of disease do you get from birds? Chirpes. It's a canarial disease, and I hear it's untweetable."

"TENS OF PEOPLE DIE EVERY YEAR FROM TIGER ATTACKS! JOIN THE MOVEMENT! #Tony2012"

"I tried 12 times to fit this joke in the 140 character limit, and I think I've finally done it. A caterpillar walks into a bar and says, ""Wh"

"I'm writing a book called 'Stop Overreacting.' But maybe I'm overreacting."

"I had to take my horse to get surgery last week The doctor told me he's in stable condition"

"If my work did a 'fireman' style calendar, I'd probably get stuck with Mr... Photographer"

"If I could be in 2 places at once, I'd mainly use it so I didn't have to leave my bed during the night to go for a wee"