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Joke of the Day

"2020 Olympic high jump results Gold - Mexico Silver - Mexico Bronze - Mexico"

"I replaced the bulb in my refrigerator with a tanning bulb... that way if I ever get fat, at least I'll have nice color."

"Why did the walrus go to the tuppeware party? To find a tight seal.. Badum tsst"

"I met a girl with 12 nipples today... ..sounds fun, dozen tit!"

"Now that I have an adult coloring book, most arguments with my 3 yr old are over fridge space."

"What Did The Hard Drive Get When It Wanted Data But Didn't Have The Resources? A Cache-Advance"

"""You're in no position to be making demands."" [does a handstand] ""Company helicopter & 2 months extra vacation."" ""Fair enough."

"What is the creepiest letter of the alphabet? V. Because no matter where you are, any time of any day, no matter what you do, V always follows U."

"I can bench 170 lbs. And by that I mean I can sit myself down on a bench in a pretty park."

"Mom: When I was your age I never had sex Me: Mom, I'm 32 Mom: Exactly"