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Joke of the Day

"Now that I have an adult coloring book, most arguments with my 3 yr old are over fridge space."

"What do you call a proud Danish countryman? A pastriot."

"What do you call a smelly fellow that makes bad jokes? Pungent"

"Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name. Coincidence? I think not..."

"I buy every comic book I see. . . My friends say I have lots of issues."

"I've never been a fan of phone sex... ... mostly because they're made out of really hard plastic."

"Q: What can you do if you don't like the Prelude in C Sharp Minor? A: Turn Rachmanin off."

"I fucked a fat woman in an elevator.. It was wrong on so many levels"

"Why was the baseball player arrested? He was involved in a hit-and-run."

"Next week I have an MRI scheduled to find out whether or not I have claustrophobia."