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Joke of the Day
"I'd rather watch a 3D video of my conception than watch one episode of The Real Housewives."
Next Joke
"I like to play music loud It's kind of my forte."
"To be honest, I really don't give a f*ck. I lose friends, make friends and make enemies everyday. Regardless, I'm still going to be me..."
"A man walks into a library asking for a book... A man walks into a library asking for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian replies, ""Fuck off, you won't return it."""
"Useful information: don't turn around if a woman throws a shoe at your back. Because more than likely the other one is in mid flight."
"Q: How do librarians file melted marshmallows? A: According to the Gooey Decimal System."
"I like my tumors like I like my bingo numbers... B9"
"I'm told I sleep like a baby. ... I wake up crying every few hours"
"NASA just released a statement that on Dec.21 at 4:30PM, it will start to get dark in New York City. They're calling it ""sunset""."
"What's Rihanna's favorite type of apple? She doesn't have one. She'll eat anyone that's bruised!"