16972

Joke of the Day

"Fat jokes aside, let's not forget fat people have feelings too Hunger"

"snapchat conversations are hard because eventually you just run out of selfie poses so you end up taking pictures of the couch or something"

"What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? He wipes his butt"

"I told the doctor I had to see him right away because I thought I was shrinking. He said he was busy and I'd just have to be a little patient."

"If global warming was causing guns to melt, we'd all be driving electric cars within two weeks."

"I sext my foreign girlfriend a lot. I've come to find it's very difficult to say I'm stroking my cock in French; Although really I should just wait till class is over."

"What do you get if you put 100 paralitycs in a hot tub? A vegetable soup"

"R.I.P water You will be mist!"

"The inventor of the Frisbee died yesterday. Per his final wishes, he'll be thrown onto the roof and forgotten about until next summer."

"Driving isn't about making the moves you want, it's about preventing others from making the moves they want."