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Joke of the Day
"What do you get if you put 100 paralitycs in a hot tub? A vegetable soup"
Next Joke
"I warn you not to mess with me! I know Karate, Judo, Aikido, Jiujitsu and 22 other japanese words."
"1: Steal ice cream van 2: Drive around slowly but never stop 3: Be proud to have helped prepare children for life's many disappointments"
"What do you call a mouse with cheese but no crackers? Cracka-lackin"
"The neighbors with the baby moved out, and now the loudest crying heard throughout the entire apartment complex comes from me."
"Teach a man to Google how to fish and he'll wind up looking at fish porn for the rest of his life."
"""Ah, Mr Bond, I-"" *closes laptop lid and pulls up trousers* ""-wasn't expecting you."""
"Why don't women drink beer at the beach? Because they'll get sand in their Schlitz."
"I went to the store to buy 50ft of rope. The guy at the store said ""This spool of rope is on clearance for only $2. It's 500ft long."" ""Nah man"" I said ""I hate long good buys."""
"I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant.. , but then I changed my mind."