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Joke of the Day
"Favorite cannibal movies: 3) Cannibal Holocaust 2) Cannibal Ferox 1) She's Having a Baby"
Next Joke
"Why can't you have a party on the moon? There's just no atmosphere"
"A man walks into a gym and asks the personal trainer which machine will make him most attractive to women.. The instructor points to the back of the gym "" The ATM machine"""
"What's an owl's favourite pin code? 2820!!!!!!!!"
"her: tell me about yourself me: ok so u know when a dog runs too fast on tile and crashes into a wall but then looks at u like its ur fault"
"Treat your woman like you treat your smartphone: touch her often, stare at her, and make her the most important thing in your life."
"Me: What do gay horses eat? Mom: Oh! I've heard this one, it's Haaaaaaay!"" Me: Wrong. Penises."
"What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife? A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry"
"I may have dry humped the Oreo section at the supermarket today, but I'm not telling. Just kidding, I totally did!"
"[my hot coworker Brenda & I at gates of Hell] BRENDA: we finally closed the gate, what should we seal it with? ME: a kiss? B: don't do that"