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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife? A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry"

"Whenever I have to park in a bad neighbourhood I leave my Blackberry in plain sight so people know there's nothing worth stealing in my car"

"Co-worker felt bad about throwing away a donation request from the Alzheimer's Association. I told him not to worry, they won't remember who they sent those to anyway."

"After all this Starbucks cup controversy, if Taco Bell was smart, they'd start serving their burritos in little cardboard mangers"

"If you look up my hair color history at the salon, you'll think I'm a unicorn."

"Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field."

"What car does Woody drive? AUDI ADUI ADUI!"

"I'm really glad they named a park bench after my uncle in memorial. It fits, he was great at having homeless ppl sleep on top of him"

"The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain."

"I visited a Blonde Doctor recently she diagnosed me with Insomnia. Don't worry she said it wasn't anything to lose sleep over."