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Joke of the Day
"[NSFW] What do snakes and condoms have in common? I don't fuck with either of them."
Next Joke
"HOT SHINGLES IN YOUR AREA GET YOUR VACCINE AT WALGREENS TODAY"
"I wasn't kicking you. I was encouraging you to get the hell out of my way."
"I have to go to twitter for my news because the news is too busy showing me tweets."
"""My first wife didn't have a gag reflex"" Wow that's amazing ""Yeah she never laughed at any of my jokes"""
"*Ouija board begins spelling* H-A-V-E_S-O-M-E ""Ooooh, spooky"" G-R-A-N-D-C-H-I-L-D-R-E-N ""Dammit Grandma, haunt someone else"""
"Why are there no living cats on Mars? Because curiosity killed them all."
"The magician got so mad he pulled his hare out."
"Made in ....... In the beginning, God created the heaven and the earth... After that, everything else was made in China."
"Whats the difference between sex and US Presidental elections? In sex,the decision to choose the cunt or the asshole is a pleasure"