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Joke of the Day

"Do you wanna play the rape game? ""no?"" Well that's the spirit!"

"Before I met my wife I always felt incomplete... Now I'm finished."

"2015 was an odd year It will all even out this year though"

"Honey, I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that the penguin pooped in the bathtub. Wife: ""But we don't *have* a penguin!"" Me: ""And now for the good news...!"""

"What do you call a brother and sister rack of ribs?? Riblings"

"No, please continue to talk loudly on the phone, smoke & spit next to my table. No problem! I'm just going to follow you home and kill you."

"How do you start a hedgehog race? Say ""GAH""."

"I just realized something. Jesus backwards is susej =sausage. Jesus is a sausage. Is this a conspiracy? I really need to know"

"Ever been so tired at work that people thought you were drunk? I hope so because that's the only excuse I have for being drunk at work."

"I have a question of the most importance!? If I find a job in the classifieds...does that mean I can't tell anyone!?"