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Joke of the Day
"Where do hipsters drown? the mainstream."
Next Joke
"What do you call it when a banana eats another banana? Canabananalism"
"My life is like a movie where two soulmates meet in line at the grocery store, except I'm the woman behind them buying tampons and cat food."
"A skeleton walks into a bar... And tells the bartender, ""I'll have a beer, and a mop."""
"Have you ever had an Ethiopian breakfast? Neither have they."
"The necrophilia is strong with this one This is my best friend. She enjoys pina coladas, long walks on the beach, and the feeling of cold dead skin upon her body. http://imgur.com/Rie20hf"
"For maximum attention, nothing beats a good mistake."
"What is the most important use for cowhide? To hold the cow together."
"Why do elephants paint their balls red? So they can hide in apple trees. What's the loudest noise in the jungle? A giraffe eating apples."
"Listen to Mom! Jim: Sometimes I wish I had listened to my mother's advice. Jon: What did she say? Jim: I dunno. I never listened!"