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Joke of the Day

"Listen to Mom! Jim: Sometimes I wish I had listened to my mother's advice. Jon: What did she say? Jim: I dunno. I never listened!"

"Did you hear about the guy who tried to have sex with an acorn? He was fucking nuts."

"The worst thing about being deaf is... when I masturbate, I can't hear anybody come in my room. *Not even myself.*"

"Penis jokes are not funny especially the short ones."

"two Penguins Two penguins went to the bakery and asked for bread. The baker asked: do you want white or brown bread. then te penguins replied: it doesnt matter because we came on our scooter."

"Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new."

"""I'll Knock You Into Next Week"" have black mothers invented time travel? Details at 11. #ABCReports"

"How many germans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Nein"

"What do you call a politician in a house fire? Burning Sanders!"

"Did you hear about the Knock-knock joke champion? He won the no bell prize."