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Joke of the Day

"Tower: Lufthansa 893 you're number one check for workers on the taxiway. Pilot: Roger ..... We've checked they're all working."

"Ladies, don't be sad if your thighs begin to start touching You're becoming a mermaid!"

"Knock knock (Me -Knock knock) (You-Whos there) (Me-Dew) (You-Drew who) (Me-Drew pecock) Say it fast ^"

"What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down and use some Lube."

"What do you call a stillborn grizzly cub? Unbearable"

"Her: I'm sorry my baby keeps crying. He's got teeth coming in. Me: Well, don't worry, I'll sign for them..."

"A Malaysian man buys a new phone... He puts it on airplane mode. Now he cant seem to find it anywhere."

"MAN: What are you doing? ME: [pointing gun at lake] Fishing MAN: No way will- SALMON: [walks out of lake with fins up]"

"PIGS A woman is walking her dog, when suddenly a man walks up to her. Man: ""Where'd you get the pig""? Woman: ""How DARE you call my dog that!"" Man: ""I was talking to the dog!"""

"I consider Words with Friends a work-related activity because it helps me take my mind off being stuck in this shithole."