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Joke of the Day

"How do you know your sister is on her period?..... Your father's dick tastes like blood..."

"You know those voices in your head? Choose the smartest, sanest one and call it you."

"Well, here I am! What are your other two wishes?"

"People think stage diving is dangerous, but not me. Because humans are made out of 95% water. So the audience is 5% away from being a pool."

"What is your favorite type of wood? Mine is morning."

"A 3 legged dog walks into a bar Did you hear about the 3 legged dog who walked into a bar? He was looking for the man who shot his paw!"

"What do you call a blind deer? No-eye deer. What do you call a blind deer with no legs? *Still* no-eye deer."

"Why are there so few black hockey players? Because there was no cotton in Canada."

"I went to an AA meeting I met a lot of batteries"

"Do you even Choo Choo? Because you are a ""Damn Girl"" Karma train"