163955

Joke of the Day

"My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating. I asked him why and he replied, ""Because I'm trying to examine you."""

"Are you the new English teacher? Yes I are."

"My father was from Iceland and my mother was from Cuba. I'm an Ice Cube."

"Two things I hate: 1) People who form negative opinions of celebrities based only on what they see or hear on TV. 2) Justin Bieber."

"What do a basketball player and a beer brewer have in common? They both have hops."

"Yo Mamas so stupid she got lost in a telephone booth."

"If meat is murder... ...then is cake battery?"

"'My boobs fall to the side when I lay down' is the new 'my boobs are real.'"

"(During sex) Pull my hair! No! Just the grey ones."

"If Ebenezer Scrooge were a sheep, what kind of hat would he wear? A Baa-Homburg!"