132491
Joke of the Day
"The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list."
Next Joke
"WIFE: You know, you're my best friend! Am I your best friend? ME: [subtly exchanges knowing glance with our dog] Of course you are, sweetie"
"Why was skrillex banned from the music shop? for dropping the bass too much"
"What's the difference between Davey Crockett and Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels is still killing Indians."
"This little piggy went to market, this little piggy stayed home, whereas this little piggy... ... went to a rape crisis centre after being introduced to David Cameron"
"What is the difference between a human dad and a moth dad? Two letters."
"Did you hear that computer scientists have designed and built the perfect tennis player? He's a big server."
"What are your thoughts on monorails? They make decent one-liners."
"Sorry, but your password must contain an uppercase letter, a number, a haiku, a gang sign, a hieroglyph, and the blood of a virgin."
"I neither like nor want to date Taylor Swift, but I know at some point it'll just be my turn."