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Joke of the Day

"If I had a dollar every time a woman called me handsome... I would employ lots of woman whose sole job will be to call me handsome."

"What's the difference between a Caucasian and an asian? The cauc."

"Fact: If you ever blow me a kiss, I'm catching it and sticking it down my pants."

"Either my cat is speaking English or that was not a vitamin I took...."

"NICK CANNON: hello and welcome to america's got talent HAWK: [hiding his talons behind his back] i misunderstood the title of this show"

"EA cut so many corners with the Sims 4 that they made a circle."

"You know what's a good joke? The CSS of this subreddit"

"How do you kill a giraffe? Punch him in the throat."

"Cashier: find everything okay? Me: yes [comes back 5 hours later] Me: [through the tears] i lied, i've been trying to find Kony since 2012"

"Do infants enjoy infantry... as much as adults enjoy adultery?"