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Joke of the Day

"He was like, 'We're all slowly dying' So I was like, 'WRONG' and I threw him in front of a moving bus."

"I got my first kiss from a girl today.... It was milk chocolate."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Annabel ! Annabel who ? Annabel would be useful on this door !"

"What does a Scotsman wear under his kilt? The codpiece he made out of his girlfriend's face."

"Road rage, because yelling and cursing at strangers in the safety of your vehicle is fun. Unless they have a gun."

"Grandpa Joe's all, I'm gonna just stay in bed for twenty years. Wait, a CHOCOLATE FACTORY? jkjk I can walk! He's my kinda people."

"What is 30 feet long and has 42 teeth? A bus full of rednecks"

"I just made the greatest construction-related pun of all time Works on so many levels"

"What do you call a mexican midget? A speck."

"Why doesn't Ronald Reagan drink orange juice? Because he's dead."