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Joke of the Day
"So i was fucking this midget with one arm (nsfw) Boy, is my arm tired."
Next Joke
"My facial tattoo is going to look so cool when I'm working as a janitor for McDonalds."
"I don't think the church is going to let me pick music for the bible group again. In my defense, the band name ""Lamb of God"" is misleading."
"Why did Florence Welch sing 'Sweet Nothing'? Because she was out of lemo-nada. It's okay guys, i'll let myself out..."
"When telling jokes to identical twins make sure you tell them the whole joke ........ because you just can't tell them a part."
"Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Because he hasn't."
"Women - What is the similarity between women and garbagebags? - You fill them up and toss them out the door!"
"I will selflessly protect my family from a life of diabetes by eating the entire box of donuts."
"""Wow, cell phones are getting ridiculously big."" ""That's a smart car."""
"I met my wife in an African Languages class We just clicked"