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Joke of the Day

"If you still pay for porn I have a Typewriter and a VCR I want to sell you."

"Did you hear about the paranoid dyslexic? He was always afraid he was following someone."

"Why couldn't the Dali Lama go out and play with his friends? Because he was grounded."

"What's red and silly? A blood clot."

"""My desires are... unconventional."" ""Show me."" *opens door to a room full of memes*"

"I always go the extra mile at work. That's why I'm a terrible taxi driver."

"I had a dream last night that I was a muffler Boy, did I wake up exhausted!"

"How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because the cops are just gonna beat the walls for being black."

"A guy died while having sex He came and went"

"What did the table fan say to his boss when he couldn't get to work on time? Ah-so-late!"