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Joke of the Day

"""My desires are... unconventional."" ""Show me."" *opens door to a room full of memes*"

"Wife: It's like every man on earth has to share one brain Me: [can't think of a good comeback because it's not my turn to use the brain]"

"Russian family conversation ""Papa, can I have 10 rubl?"" ""20 rubl? Why you need 30 rubl!?"""

"The pilot asks over the PA system whether there's a doctor on board From the back a guy shouts ""I'm a vegan!"""

"Outbreak - New Strain of Bird Flu Discovered!!! It's called Chirpies. It's a Canarial Disease. It's Untweetable."

"What begins with P and ends with orn? Popcorn, of course!"

"why doe s porn hub even have a share to google + button? I dont want any one to know i have a google +..."

"[6:00pm] i will not snack tonight i will not snack tonight i will not snack tonight [11:00pm] yay i did it! [11:01pm] *preheats oven*"

"I'll bet you, like me, average the most ""uh""s per sentence when ordering at a fast food drive thru."

"The avengers walk into a bar Except vision. He phased."