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Joke of the Day

"Why did the feminist masseuse stop at the thigh? She didn't like to massage a knee."

"What do you call a cow with only two legs? Lean Beef!"

"What's the worst thing about losing your hand You're also losing your girlfriend"

"The 4th little pig built his house into a windmill. The wolf huffed and puffed and generated enough power to last the whole winter."

"""I'm constantly quoting myself. Like right now, for instance."" I just said that."

"Why was Lindsay Lohan feeling sleepy? He was buying drinks."

"""Umm, what are you doing? Can you not? Seriously, get off me!"" - The first horse ever ridden (probably)"

"What do you say to a one legged hitch-hiker? Hop in."

"Whenever I poke my cat in the eye and he gets squinty, I feel bad and poke him in the other eye, so I can pretend he's just really high."

"A man walks into a bar... Ouch"