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Joke of the Day

"Would've totally banged this chick at the bar, but I noticed she had a crooked pinkie toe. Better luck with someone without standards,babe."

"I met a guy with a tattoo on his penis that said ""Shorty"". When he got an erection, it said ""Shorty's Truck Stop Chattanooga, Tennessee""."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Craig ! Craig who ? Craig in the wall !"

"My dog understands four words: his name, food, outside and Antidisestablishmentarianism."

"I accidentally ran over a leprachaun. I brought it home and cooked it up. TRAGICALLY DELICIOUS!"

"Melania Trump walks into a bar... and orders and Angel shot with lime."

"Three guys walk into a bar... The fourth one ducks under it."

"My wife always compliments me after an argument. ""I couldn't have married a bigger d!ck"""

"Everyone criticizes the Salem Witch Trials, but we haven't had a witch attack in over 200 years."

"Tonight on My Strange Addition Man addicted to brake fluid claims he can stop at any time"