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Joke of the Day

"Santa Claus came early! Mrs. Claus wasn't too happy."

"Why can't Stevie Wonder read? (offensive) Because he's black."

"A magician was driving down the road when suddenly... He turned into a driveway!"

"What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds"

"I'm eating a bottle of glitter so when I get drunk and throw up tonight people will think I'm a unicorn in human form."

"Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don't work! h/t to Big Mike, Tha Gangsta of Luv."

"Twitter management's favorite part of a book is always Chapter 11"

"Why does the letter ""r"" make all the difference between Friday and Sunday? payday vs prayday."

"Why did the suicidal chicken cross the road? To get to the... *other* side."

"What's red, round and goes up and down, up and down? A tomato in an elevator"