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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend keeps mixing up the names of the characters from the X-files. If she does it again, I'm gonna sculder!"

"Q: What kind of court order would be placed on a pig in order to prevent it from taking a specific course of action? A: An inj-oink-tion."

"What do women and hurricanes have in common? When they come, they are wet and wild, and when they leave they take the house."

"It should cost $87 to leave someone a voicemail."

"I hate when old people poke you at a wedding and say ""you're next"". So next time I was at a funeral I poked them and said ""you're next"

"What do you call a government official that can't leave an airport because of a blizzard? Edward Snowed In"

"Just did my taxes. Put $420.69 on every line and 5 IRS agents just showed up at my door with a keg, 3 strippers and giant foam fingers."

"Why does Jay Z love Christmas? Because he's the best wrapper alive."

"What does a black and white bear use to cook it's dinner? A pan, duh!"

"Why is Peter Pan always flying? He neverlands You really should upvote this joke because it never gets old"