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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an anorexic.. What do you call an anorexic chick with a yeast infection? Quarter-pounder with cheese"

"Some people say it's not what you know, but who you know... I say it's not who you know, but whom you know."

"""woofwoof, woof"" -my neighbor's dog telling me his views on politics lol you gotta look at both sides tho fam"

"A bank is a place that will lend you money.... if you can prove that you don't need it."

"What's the definition of a 68? That's when you blow me and I owe you 1."

"A tree tipped over A lot of pounds crashed to the ground"

"What did the host of an orgy say to his guests? I'm glad you all came!"

"I once hung out with Lebron James and Nicolas Cage... ... and they spent the whole day trying to outflop each other. :)"

"Q: How can you tell if a violin is out of tune? A: The bow is moving."

"Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? It went OK."