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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a white supremacist who doesn't eat meat? A vegitaryan"
Next Joke
"Adopted Friend I feel really bad for my adopted friend. He is going through an existential crisis. Which sort of makes him like his Dad. He doesn't really know who he is."
"What's the difference between a Ritz and a lesbian? One is a snack cracker and the other a crack snacker."
"Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer. Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face."
"Why couldn't the Italian phone salesman open up his shop... He had a Nokia"
"Mum Mum Dad's broken my computer! How did he do that? I dropped it on his head."
"Why does it say TRD on that Toyota truck? Because it's a turd!"
"Server friend was complaining about her pay at local restaurant Server friend was complaining about her job at local restaurant. So I say, ""Don't worry. Good things come those who wait."""
"last night, my wife started smoking. but it was ok - I just slowed down a bit and used some lube."
"Never judge a book by its cover. Besides, you're on Twitter and don't even read books."