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Joke of the Day

"I don't get why you have to call my wife *librarian ignores me while on phone* ""your husband is here trying to check out a book about ramps"""

Next Joke
 
"Two Fish there was two fish in a tank and one of the fish said do you know how to drive this thing BECAUSE THE FISH ARE DRIVEING THE TANK IN A WAR"
"HOLY SHIT I JUST CORRECTLY GUESSED A WIFI PASSWORD AM I JESUS?"
"I asked for her number she said sex sex sex I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight! I said, Wow! Then her friend said, She means 666-3629."
"For yoga people He who noticed it lotused it"
"It's so hot today I went to see the ex just for the cold shoulder and icy stare."
"What is Beethoven doing right now? Decomposing."
"Why did Jesus get pulled over for drunk driving? He had a blood alcohol content of 12.00%. It's made of wine, after all."
"My wife lost interest in sex with me because... ..of my gut, but we still have one thing in common: Neither one of us has seen my dick in years."
"It's way more acceptable to be fat if you have an SUV."