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Joke of the Day

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal and wanted to get hit by a car."

"How do you celebrate July 4th in Canada? Not by getting drunk and blowing off your fingers, because it's just a regular day fir you."

"Whenever someone jokingly replies, ""Blocked,"" I laugh and laugh and then go check."

"I used to be indecisive... but now I'm not so sure."

"Why are pornstars so religious? They keep yelling 'oh God yes!' all the time."

"What happened when a ghost asked for a brandy at his local pub? The landlord said ""Sorry we don't serve spirits."""

"What's brown and sticky A brown stick"

"What's the difference between Mick Jagger, and a Scottish farmer? Mick Jagger says 'Hey, you, get off of my cloud' The Scottish farmer says 'Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe'"

"Thanks for yelling at me and calling me names on the internet. I have the same opinion as you do now"

"What did Hamlet say when he was thinking of sending a message? To e or not to e that is the question."