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Joke of the Day

"I've never tried Frosted Flakes cereal But I've heard great things about it."

"Today is National 'Secure a rich lover' Day Mate wealth, 2016."

"Take your height in centimeters and multiply it by the number of people from whom you have received oral sex. There's your credit score."

"Got one for the guys (semi-nsfw) Here's a joke: ""pussy!"" ............... Don't get it? Well you never will!"

"I scaled Everest! And I give nicknames to fish."

"What should you buy if your hair falls out ? A good vacuum cleaner !"

"Lindt chocolate... .....is to die for."

"*walks into bar with camera* Me: Can I take a shot of this glass? Bartender: Take a pitcher, it'll last longer"

"Just tried to kill a snake in the backyard. And by kill I mean screaming as loudly as a human can in an attempt to make its head explode."

"What did the man say when the calculator agreed to help him load the car? I KNEW I COULD COUNT ON YOU"