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Joke of the Day

"Telling a racist joke is like getting in a car with an asian driver If they are not really good, there's a very good chance you'll crash and burn."

"Ted Cruz, according to the news, IS planning THat Either cruZ Or his aDminIstrAtion will be Compiling their documents to maKe a IntegraL poLitical announcemEnt this afteRnoon [hope you can decrypt it]"

"What's the difference between eating out pussy and drinking American Beer? Pussy only tastes like piss in the beginning."

"How does the Consigliere get into the Godfather's house late at night? with his own set of donkeys!"

"I held an orgy for my sexual dysfunction class last night. Nobody came."

"What is it Lassie? Timmy fell down a well? Earthquake in LA? The Russians are coming? You found a plane? No? ...Oh, you want another beer."

"I kicked my rear-view mirror addiction... I'm never looking back."

"I just had a massive case of diarrhea... And I couldn't tell if it was the watermelon or the nuts"

"Angel: God.. Were you drunk creating last night? God: no..... Angel: *holds up platypus God: a little.."

"Some people like to stir the pot... ...I prefer to smoke it."