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Joke of the Day

"What's the first step in getting accepted to carpentry school? Submitting a stool sample."

"Every time I think I've come up with a great FB status and no one likes it I die a little inside"

"What is Russia's favorite type of pasta? Putinesca"

"Someone really has to have a serious talk with birds about their pooping habits Do they really think we're gonna let that shit fly?"

"I commented on a ELI5 about occam's razor. My answer wasn't long enough and was flagged by the moderator-bot."

"20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope, and Steve Jobs. Now we have no cash, no hope, and no jobs."

"How is a woman like a condom? They both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick!"

"I hate racism and black people."

"Whats the difference between puberty and prostitution? One is caused by hormones and one causes whore moans"

"One for the school kids this morning. What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhinoceros? Elephino."