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Joke of the Day

"Saw a grown man riding down the street on a BMX. I yelled what does BMX stand for? He replied ""DUI""."

"Mad scientist- Checks for Labs Bartender- Checks for Tabs Boxer- Checks for Jabs Uber- Checks for Cabs Your back - Checks for Stabs"

"A friend from New Zealand asked me to put a wedge of lime in his cocktail. He took a sip and said ""Thank you, I couldn't have made it bitter myself!"""

"Congratulations, Americans who write ""Cheers"" at the end of e-mails. You've found something even more pretentious than ""Sent from my iPhone"""

"Where do Tumblr users go to pray? The Cis-Teen Chapel"

"Never take ecstasy with a squirrel named... hey, squirrel dude, what's your name? Charles? Never take ecstasy with a squirrel named Charles."

"My wife did 70 chores around the house Cooking and 69."

"Why did the bee get married? He found his honey!"

"A creationist puts his glases on and says: ""Evolution can't be real, just look at the human eye!! It's too perfect to be just chance!"""

"I don't care if you don't like space puns. I like space puns. Comet me bro."