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Joke of the Day

"Mad scientist- Checks for Labs Bartender- Checks for Tabs Boxer- Checks for Jabs Uber- Checks for Cabs Your back - Checks for Stabs"

"I could never be gay I just can't have sex with someone I respect"

"Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple."

"Two Fish there was two fish in a tank and one of the fish said do you know how to drive this thing BECAUSE THE FISH ARE DRIVEING THE TANK IN A WAR"

"I'm developing a fear of German sausages... I fear the wurst!"

"Why do white girls hang out in odd numbers?? cuz they can't even!!!!"

"Teacher: Tommy Russell you're late again. Tommy: Sorry sir. It's my bus - it's always coming late. Teacher: Well if it's late again tomorrow catch an earlier one."

"What's the difference between the Polish and polish? No one bats an eye if you use chemicals to remove polish, but if you use chemicals to remove the Polish, most of the world will turn against you"

"Don't waste electricity. How would you like it if I turned you on and walked away?"

"What is better than a rose on a piano? Tulips on the organ. (I'll show myself out...)"