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Joke of the Day

"Are you on a Wanted Poster, because you are sketchy as hell..."

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"Pretty sure Craigslist is just a secret genetics lab and they send out their failed experiments to come pick up the stuff you sell there."
"Starbucks? Yes I'd like a tepid mug of milk froth please. My name's Adam, but you can call me Aldin."
"TIFU by accidentally playing music off of my neighbors speakers. Whoops, wrong sub."
"Knock knock new fone who dis"
"I thought you'd be flattered that my dog found your leg so attractive."
"Why can't your children be like my office voice mail? Seen but not heard"
"Hey guys with your phone in a hip holster, is it because your purse is too full with tampons?"
"If a kid refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?"
"How Many Business Analysts Does It Take To Change A Light Bulb? None. The light bulb shall never burn out. (OK. It's more cathartic than funny...)"