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Joke of the Day

"Japan is not a Democracy. It's a Constitutional Monarchy. They don't have big erections."

"What do you call cheap circumcision? A ripoff."

"Procrastination is a dish best served eventually."

"What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing, they were both stuck-up bitches"

"Men are better cooks With just a piece of sausage and an egg, they can fill a woman's tummy for 9 months."

"My son asked me what it was like to be married I deleted all the music off his iPod except one song."

"Did you hear about the erectile dysfunction support group meeting? It was a total flop, nobody came."

"CARPET SALESMAN: [sighing, handing me another sample] What about this one for your bedroom? ME: Hmmm no that one is also far too small"

"St. Peter: ""Spock?"" Leonard Nimoy: ""I'm Leonard. Spock was just a character I played on TV."" St. Peter: ""HEY EVERYBODY! IT'S SPOCK!"""

"""I wish you would stop staring at my breasts. "" said the barmaid, ""you're making me uncomfortable. "" ""Uncomfortable?"" I replied, ""you want to try sitting on one of these stools with an hard on. """